Okay, it's finally happened. Overload is here.
This morning I got up at the normal time, fed the cat, had breakfast, watched 20 minutes of GMA, and checked my e-mail. I showered and was ready to head to work--nice and early--when I realized I hadn't written checks for the first-of-the-month bills. I had lots of time, so I grabbed the stack and sat down to write. I did fine until I came to the mortgage payment. I didn't have the bill.
I knew I'd received it. I knew it had to be here. It's a small house, so how lost could it be? Thirty minutes later, I finally decided to copy last month's statement and send the check in with that. But I had to find the correct address to send it to, otherwise it would end up in the wrong office. then I'd be charged a late fee. Finding the address took another 15 minutes.
Now I was falling behind in my time frame. I had to put outgoing mail in the mailbox, drop an address and a box of stuff at a friend's house, and get gas in the car on my way. I did all that, then pulled into my parking place in a far distant parking lot on campus, parked, turned off the car, got out, opened the back door to get my teaching bag, and mentally shot myself in the head.
I had completely forgotten to put my teaching materials in the car! But I live close to campus, so I can run home, right? No, I can't. Class starts in 15 minutes, just about the time it takes to get home, but not back, parked, and in the classroom. Okay, I had to forgive myself and move on. My karma is good--it's lab day.
So why am I heading for overload? It could have something to do with the schedule I've kept for the last week: three days in Savannah with my grandchildren, calling 911 to take my elderly neighbor to the hospital, caring for a post-surgical friend, and in between it all, grading annotated bibliographies. They are about half-done, and I hope to finish them this weekend, when I head to Savannah to pick up my grand-dog, who will stay with me next week while her family travels. Oh, and I've had a lousy head cold, too. Not bad enough to be sick, just feeling like my head is sitting across the room!
Am I whining? You betcha! When will it get better? When I learn to say no. When I learn to set boundaries. When I learn to put myself first. Will that ever happen? Probably not. As my daughter often tells me, I am a caregiver by birth. It's in the genes.
Is there good news? Yes. This is the end of week 10--only five more weeks of this semester. And a few blesssed weeks before summer teaching begins. My post-surgical friend is getting better quickly.
My grandchildren will become self-sufficient some day, and my grand-dog, who is 15, will one day go to doggie heaven. And some day, I'll retire, and overload will be a distant dream.
This morning I got up at the normal time, fed the cat, had breakfast, watched 20 minutes of GMA, and checked my e-mail. I showered and was ready to head to work--nice and early--when I realized I hadn't written checks for the first-of-the-month bills. I had lots of time, so I grabbed the stack and sat down to write. I did fine until I came to the mortgage payment. I didn't have the bill.
I knew I'd received it. I knew it had to be here. It's a small house, so how lost could it be? Thirty minutes later, I finally decided to copy last month's statement and send the check in with that. But I had to find the correct address to send it to, otherwise it would end up in the wrong office. then I'd be charged a late fee. Finding the address took another 15 minutes.
Now I was falling behind in my time frame. I had to put outgoing mail in the mailbox, drop an address and a box of stuff at a friend's house, and get gas in the car on my way. I did all that, then pulled into my parking place in a far distant parking lot on campus, parked, turned off the car, got out, opened the back door to get my teaching bag, and mentally shot myself in the head.
I had completely forgotten to put my teaching materials in the car! But I live close to campus, so I can run home, right? No, I can't. Class starts in 15 minutes, just about the time it takes to get home, but not back, parked, and in the classroom. Okay, I had to forgive myself and move on. My karma is good--it's lab day.
So why am I heading for overload? It could have something to do with the schedule I've kept for the last week: three days in Savannah with my grandchildren, calling 911 to take my elderly neighbor to the hospital, caring for a post-surgical friend, and in between it all, grading annotated bibliographies. They are about half-done, and I hope to finish them this weekend, when I head to Savannah to pick up my grand-dog, who will stay with me next week while her family travels. Oh, and I've had a lousy head cold, too. Not bad enough to be sick, just feeling like my head is sitting across the room!
Am I whining? You betcha! When will it get better? When I learn to say no. When I learn to set boundaries. When I learn to put myself first. Will that ever happen? Probably not. As my daughter often tells me, I am a caregiver by birth. It's in the genes.
Is there good news? Yes. This is the end of week 10--only five more weeks of this semester. And a few blesssed weeks before summer teaching begins. My post-surgical friend is getting better quickly.
My grandchildren will become self-sufficient some day, and my grand-dog, who is 15, will one day go to doggie heaven. And some day, I'll retire, and overload will be a distant dream.
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